Pop Culture Mulcher

Christmas was a non-event this year. We don’t decorate our house for Christmas. We tell ourselves and others it’s because the whole! city! decorates! for us! I mean, we do have that thirty foot Christmas tree a block away in Campus Martius (please don’t use that information to stalk me or hunt me down and wear me as a jaunty fat girl suit), so it’s kind of true. Really, though, hauling a Christmas tree up twenty stories and then decorating it is not my idea of fun. Plus our cats are demons and would probably consume it in one night and then merrily shit out pine needles for a month and a half.

Also, I had multiple surgical procedures in the quarter year prior and Guy was having a hella stressful time at work, so when we saw something we wanted, were just like shit, give it to me now and also kind of I’m too tired to buy you a present so just get yourself something on Amazon. 

On Christmas Day, we didn’t have any presents to open nor a tree to sit demurely by, but it’s okay because I slept for seventeen hours, felt very disoriented, and pissed blood. Either I was passing a kidney stone or I was taking the War On Christmas™ to a cellular level.

But Amazon is doing that whole ten points on the dollar for digital downloads thing and I have decided to finally buy myself some Christmas Kindle books. Give me some book recommendations?